Porn Porn Everywhere

It’s everywhere!
But that’s only part of the problem

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The biggest issue is that it is going into our minds. Seeping in. Making it’s home in our very own hearts!

This is scary people.
Very VERY FRIGHTENING!!

It is what a lot of young boys are growing up on.
Kids hearts and minds are innocent, tender, trusting and need to be safeguarded from the negative influences of increasingly violent and sexualized media!

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Pornography teaches sex without love, intimacy, tender touch, responsibility, and commitment.”!!
http://t.co/bpXEWtjKw2

Pornography is more then a small sexual “secret”. Believe me I’ve read enough, I’ve seen enough and I have felt enough to KNOW it is an extremely wicked problem!

It may have started as a “fun” guilty pleasure but it has now (thanks to the internet) grown into a massive and festering addiction.

Pornography should be banned as SUPER-ADDICTIVE and DANGEROUS drug/behaviour much like Heroin, Crack, Crystal Meth!:
http://t.co/LAgMCysbgL

The research is there.
The findings are true.
Porn is as addictive as drugs!
Addicts crave it. Not because they necessarily like it.
Chances are they don’t even want to give in and watch it. But the cravings are there and they only continue to get BIGGER every time the addict gives in and bites!

It really is a very sad epidemic.
If you dont consider yourself a porn/sex addict then you might deny these facts.
You might only consider yourself “a moderate user”. But as any drug addict will testify. The cravings will grow undoubtedly.

And with porn there is NO EXCEPTION!
Just ask the man that can tell you that it all began when he just started with “normal” porn videos and/or images. But eventually his body needed more. His “fun” ended with an arrest of child pornography.
But you say that won’t happen to you. How can you be sure?
Are you willing to take that risk?

Is porn really that good that you would sacrifice everything for it?
Not only do you lose your purity and if you’re a man your manhood. But if that’s not enough your family, your wife, your children, and your respect is also all on the line!
So tell me is it truly worth it?

I’m sure the husband that has already lost it ALL would tell you it’s not!
I’m sure the wife that has felt the agony and excruciating heartbreak because of it would tell you it’s not!
And I’m sure the children that have been neglected and pushed to the side all because of their dad’s porn/sexual addiction/problem would cry out it’s not!

I pretty sure we all have heard the stories how an addiction started with a few beers. A couple cigarettes. A line of coke. No addict intended to become a full blown out addict.

No human being with a heart intends to neglect, abuse, push away, scar, or destroy the very ones they love and who love them.

Pornography leads to affairs. (Because it is an affair)!
Pornography can lead to rape. Pornography leads people into hellish fetishes that they would have never ever thought about in the first place without porn.

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Pornography IS NOT NORMAL.
How can humans being degraded, abused and used be normal??

You watch that porn video and it starts off feeling good but believe me; not too far away there is a man or woman who is alone in his/her room pounding the floor, asking God to take away this vicious addiction! And he/she would tell you don’t do it! Don’t even begin with that one video! Don’t even think about it.

I as a parent would honestly advise my children to not even begin messing around with any drug.
So the same goes with porn.
It is a drug!
And I pray that one day it will be illegal and completely banned.
The repercussions are huge!

I am very positive that many reading could easily admit to falling into the trap of pornography.
I am very positive that many reading could admit that pronography did indeed lead them to do other things they truly did not even want to do.

Sex was NEVER meant to be dirty.
Sex is more then an act.
It’s something so deep.
Something so personal and private but not because it’s shameful. But because it’s meant to be between two people who sacrificially love each other with no doubt, no reserve.
And when you love somebody so sacrificially, & so immensely you do not want to share that personal and private bond with nobody!! No, not a picture, not a video, no peeking! That bond, that personal time… NO ONE should be able to sneak upon, to peek upon, or to watch it!

Sex is an intertwining of a husband and wife’s soul. They are one. And God, yes God looks upon that as good.

Your soul is costly woman.
You can not just give it away to any man. I mean you could but why? When your soul has so much more meaning and purpose! Your soul longs to be one with another soul. But you can in no way give yourself(your soul) away repeatedly to guy after guy with NO consequences.
You hurt yourself painfully more then you know when you do. It’s almost like you burn away at your own heart. Your heart over time becomes hardened and numb.

That is what I believe happens to all those precious girls in those porn videos. At the end they lose out.
Oh what many of them would give just to gain back their innocence.

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And they have the porn/sex addict to thank for a lot of their pain.
For demand fuels the porn industry.
Kill the demand. Kill the porn industry.
Not that easy. I know. But it’s a start.

There may be a lot we can’t do.
But I know there is way more we CAN do! Even if it’s a small change.

So come on! Lets fight this demon!
I believe in you.

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* * * * * * * * * * *
On Twitter: @songsofintimacy
And help share awareness with this hashtag #LetsFightThisDemon

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When did abusing women become the norm?

Tell me. What would you do if you seen a man in public abusing a woman?

Slapping her around. Puncking her around. Pushing her around.
What would you do or how would you handle that situation especially as a man?

Not to long ago I watched this video about how people responded when they witnessed a couple (two “actors”) in the middle of domestic abuse.

It was good to see that people stood up and intervened!

But for me the best scene was when a man came from behind the boyfriend(actor) and kinda tackled him down to the ground to ‘rescue’ the girl.
It actually made me want to cry even because of the man’s bravery to step in and help!
And even after they informed the man that it was not real and just part of an experiment to raise awareness on domestic abuse. The man continues to ask the girl if she’s okay.

Then it made me think…
“Public” abuse of any kind is considered horrible, illegal, and shameful. BUT what about all the “private” abuse that goes on? You know.. abuse that is kept on the down low.
Like exploitation of women and children!

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Or the sexualization of girls.

It’s pretty much everywhere.

Turn on the T.V. BOOM! There it is.
Walk around at the mall and it’ll slap you in the face.
Turn on the radio and yup it’s there too.

And if all else fails. Well, just give it up for porn. Because that sucker will chew you up and spit you out. Leaving you disrespecting girls and callous towards women in general.

No wonder women easily walk around believing they are only worth what they can do sexually!

And the sad part is men sit by and just watch!
They don’t come to their rescue. They don’t run in harms way to save us.
Instead of using their strength and power to push aside or “tackle” whatever is hurting us. They give it all away to their own selfish sexual desires.
Not even realizing
they are left spiritually castrated.
For sexual immorality indeed sucks out all of a man’s valor and strength.

Proverbs 31:3-
O my son, Do not give your strength to women

Proverbs 23:27-28-
For a whore is a deep pit, And a seductress is a narrow well.
She also lies in wait as for a victim, And increases the unfaithful among men.

I can’t speak for a man because I’m not one.
But I could only hope that men would STOP allowing women to be treated as objects that are only used.
And instead magnify their actions that would proclaim that women are human beings to be LOVED!

A man might ask: How?
And this is what I would recommend as a woman myself.

If and when they see a woman being objectified (which means treating a person as a thing, without regard to their dignity).
When they see a girl being sexualized.
Stop! Speak up! Say something!
Help her! Rescue her!
And many times that could simply mean
-TURNING OFF THE T.V.
-CHANGING THE MOVIE. -Or changing the music you hear.
-GIVING UP PORNOGRAPHY for good.
-Speaking to their daughters about modesty.
-Speaking to their sons about respecting all girls.
Yes, even if they are dressed like prostitutes.

It would be awesome to see men try it.
Next time they came into contact with a girl/woman that unknowingly had the words “Use me” written all over her. Truly look at her. Into her eyes and tell yourself ‘she is somebody’s daughter’.
Engrave it into your mind that she is worthy of respect and honor and love. Not that she might be dressed like it. BUT because she is a human being just like you.

At the end of the day. When all is said and done. We ALL want to be loved. No matter if we think we deserve it or not. No matter if everyone else told us or made us feel unwanted.
We all need love.

So let’s all try it.
Let’s do our part in NOT allowing ourselves or other women to be treated as things.

*Sadly, I believe lots of people take part in helping the exploitation of children and women without even knowing it.

A man can sit there and watch porn. He can sit there unmoved while a women is getting raped and violently abused in every way possible. He can sit there and witness the exploitation of a girl AND NOT BE MOVED TO RESCUE HER. TO SAVE HER?
What is wrong with that picture?!

I can only hope and pray that women everywhere would stand up, take control and shout NO MORE! to what is being done to them.

I can only continue to hope that men everywhere would push away the vices and gain back their strength once again and FIGHT FOR US!
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And for ALL the men that already are (yes they do still exist)
THANK YOU!
May your reward be great!

~~songsofintimacy. 💋

True Sex=pure physical tenderness

I once believed that sex was somehow connected to aggression.

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In a world that glamorizes pornography, pimps, and lust. It’s fairly easy to get sucked into the lie that sex is not special, not truly intimate, and NOT RESPECTABLE.
That sex is just something “everyone” does solely
and ultimately for self-pleasure.

That is exactly what this world would want you to believe.

And I did. I fell into that ocean of deceit.
I can’t tell you when I did. But I believe it had to have been someplace during my childhood.

My vision and idea of sex became distorted.

If only someone would have told me or better yet if I would’ve believed that true pure sex DOES NOT fall into the same category as violence and aggression!

True intimacy DOES NOT feed off of humiliation of a woman.
***That is one reason why pornography can NEVER and WILL NEVER substitute or even come near to comparing to what God created sex to be.

God intended sex to be PURE PHYSICAL TENDERNESS.
Say it again. Out-loud this time. Slowly.
PURE – PHYSICAL – TENDERNESS

Those three words alone caused me to view sex different than what I had believed sex was.

I went years not really knowing or understanding what sex was all about. Even after I married.
And maybe I still don’t understand it fully but one thing I know without a doubt is that: the belief of sexual intimacy that this world holds IS NOT TRUE! That the view of sex that so many people carry IS NOT REAL!

And you can bet that it has a lot to do with living in a strong pornified generation.
Where based on a survey that was done 64 percent of American men and 20 percent of women view pornography at least monthly. AND… you might want to sit down for this…. 18 percent of men believe they may be addicted to pornography. That’s more than 20 million men in deep trouble.

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Porn alters the brain.
Porn dehumanizes women.
Porn promotes rape. It fuels the rape culture.

After swallowing all that…it’s No wonder why we have too many men walking around really “believing” that sex is just a loveless, cheap, repetitive act.

*Galatians 5:19-21MSG
It is obvious what kind of life develops out of trying to get your own way all the time: repetitive, loveless, cheap sex; a stinking accumulation of mental and emotional garbage.

Do you really believe that is what we were created for? No.
We are created for more then this garbage that trys to suck anyone in.
It is not racist.
It is waiting to feed off of you.
If you let it.

My heart and mind had become it’s victim at a way too early age.

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I fell into it’s snare. Unknowingly.
And even though I probably wouldn’t have admitted it…..my actions told a different story.

I grew up in a home where a true marriage was never modeled. Almost every relationship around me was a bad example of what it should’ve been.

I didn’t know a thing about modesty,
self-control,
respect,
chivalry,
honoring,
commitment,
integrity,
loyalty.

You see I gave myself away at 15.
But what I didn’t know at the time was that I had already given myself away long before that.
I had slowly given my heart and mind over to “beliefs” that I thought I knew to be TRUE.

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I thought attention and desire alone was love.
But in reality they were traps that led me deeper and deeper into one of the biggest lies I would end up believing.
That sex was everything but love. Everything but pure. Everything but bonding.
Pretty much anything but what God had created it to be.

And those “beliefs” led me and were leading me to some very dark roads.
A road that I now know (12 years later) if given the chance would’ve been pornography. Crazy to think that something I extremely ABHOR now is something I could’ve been a part of.

Every porn worker(star), every stripper, every sex worker willingly or unwilling had a childhood dream once. And I promise you it wasn’t to grow up and become a prostitute, a whore, or a sex slave.

One thing we all have in common is: We all were at one time in a sense innocent. We believed in love. In Hope. And if someone would’ve told us at that time that sex indeed equaled pure physical tenderness and NOTHING LESS. We would’ve wholeheartedly believed it.

What if I told you that sex was supposed to be a soul-bond forever with
the person you chose to spend the the rest of your life with.
A bond only you would share with that person all your life long. A commitment. A holy gift.

Not something that was meant to be forced. Not something cheap or loveless. Not something just done to excite or entertain others. Not something dirty and impure.

To me it is so very sad that it can take years for someone to actually realize that. When it’s always been the truth.

When you understand Who created intimacy in the first place…you’ll begin to understand what it is. And what it’s NOT.
I believe that is the place where men and women in a sense can gain back that innocence.
It’s hard. But bad habits can be broken. Brain maps can be changed.

We are created for intimacy.
Just not the kind this world, the media, or porn tells you.

I am now no longer ‘bound’ to those “beliefs” I once thought to be true. Because now I know the truth. And the Truth has set me free!

John 8:32
“Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

It hurts my heart to know that I was stuck in that pit of lies for so long. Even after I was saved and married. Coming to a point where I couldn’t even enjoy intimacy with my husband because of the lies deeply embedded inside my mind. But God so graciously shined light and exposed it so He could purge it and wash it away.
I am a work in progress.
…From glory to glory friends.

There is always Hope. No matter how messed up our minds have become.
We live in a fallen world.
But the garbage this world would have you eat could NEVER exceed
the reason you were created.

For true, pure, wonderful intimacy first and foremost with your Creator. A love so clean and relishing. That you could never again allow a man to treat you the way you once believed they were supposed to.

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True Freedom is peace my friend.

Believe it.

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Sexual Freedom-Multiple sex partners

Is sexual freedom really free?

Women are free to have sex with anyone they want.
Anytime they want.
Wherever they want.
“SEXUAL FREEDOM”.

But is it really “free” when it takes so much from you? When it robs you of so much. Whether you willingly give it or not. It WILL take from you.

Just stop and look around and you’ll notice countless of girls and women walking about…..that have had their dignity taken from them.
Their self-respect gone.
Their self-worth gone.
Their innocence, their purity, their softness even…GONE. ERASED. TAKEN. STOLEN. Most of the time given away freely by choice.
All in the name of “SEXUAL FREEDOM”.

I chose to give mine away at the age of 15.

My self-worth came from how much attention I could gather from the opposite sex.
It should’ve came directly from my father. Because that’s where I believe every girls self worth stems from. Begins from.
And well sadly I wasn’t given much attention from there.
But the longing was still there.
Inside me.
Just waiting to be fulfilled.
And since it didn’t come to me.
I went out searching for it on my own.
So…. when I was faced with the opportunity to finally gain some much needed attention…. Yup, you guessed it. I GAVE IN.
How many 15 yr old girls like me would’ve? How many DO.
Day after day after day.
And while I gained the attention I so desperately wanted my heart was in return losing so much.
My innocence gone.
My purity washed away.
My self-respect in the trash.
And little did I know at the time my self-worth was actually being torn to shreds.

I read this article and others about how having multiple sex partners actually makes young girls sad, depressed, and even suicidal.

And memories return of how I was unknowingly giving away the very essences that would’ve kept me content and safely on the road to happiness.
But instead I gave it up for short term “”love””, “fun”, and attention. And what was I left with?
Sadness.
Heartbreak. Which led to more sadness.
Depression. Which led to suicidal thoughts and feelings.
Yeah, all this at the tender age of only 16.

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So what a lot of these young girls (and women) that are indulging themselves in “sexual freedom” don’t realize is that in reality IT ISN’T FREE!
IT DOES INDEED TAKE FROM YOU!
The Cost Is Terrible!

I’ve personally witnessed hearts torn, shattered, and bruised after they chose again and again and again to give their dignity away, their self-worth and self-respect away.
THIS IS REAL!!
And It’s happening around us every day!
Just stop awhile and look around. There she is. The girl that gives away her body night after night, party after party. Not because she’s a slut. But maybe because as she gives it up to some dude that is basking in the lust of it. She is in her own little world hoping that it will just quiet her hearts cry for love, attention, and self-worth.
But of course it WON’T!
IT NEVER DOES.
But sadly, she’ll continue trying. Again and again and again.
Same game. Only different faces.

And that my friend is the Multiple Sex Partner TRAP!

It’s so easy to fall into.
And once your in- it’ll strip you!
It’ll strip you of everything your heart truly is. The heart that God created and formed even before you were born.
It slowly chews away at it.
Leaving you feeling used.
Shamed. Disrespected.
Hardened. Calloused.
Bitter.
It’s an unbearable cycle almost like being on a merry-go-round that never stops spinning.

But there is a way out.
There is an escape route.

Jesus Christ made you to want love. To crave something more than what this world can offer and nothing in it can give you. So you would go after Him. So you would pursue Him for it. He has ALL you need. And He freely gives it! Now that is free. Because He already paid for it. He already paid for you.

HE ALREADY KNOWS YOUR WORTH!

You can finally stop searching! He’s right there. Just look up.
He hears your hearts cry.
He sees your souls longings.
And He says, Everything your searching for is in Me.

** Matthew 11:28-29 **
Jesus said, “Come to Me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. … Let Me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

Are you or someone you know tired of being hurt by this evil trap?
Tired of it using you, abusing you, and making you cry?
Some cry themselves to sleep.
Some run back to it over and over again.
And there’s probably girls and women that actually kill themselves when they realize that this trap never did and never will satisfy or fill the deep hole they have in their heart.

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But believe me. There is a way out. I know because He rescued me.
He took my ashes. (The mess I made.) And in return He gave me back my dignity, my self-worth!
I learned self-respect again.
I learned what purity truly meant.
And I finally can say I know what love is. And I promise you won’t find it anywhere else.

So if your young or old and hungry for attention. Run to the One who freely gives it. And don’t join the Multiple Sex Partners Trap.

***

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16 yrs old and 14 sex partners

Doctor: You have Chlamydia

16 yr old girl: blinks

Doctor: How many sex partners have you had?

Girl: In my lifetime?

Doctor: Yeah, Lets start with your lifetime.

Girl: Fourteen

Doctor: Do you use condoms?

Girl: Sometimes..

Doctor: How do you decide if your going to use a condom or not?

Girl: If it’s serious.

Doctor: How many serious relationships have you had?

Girl: Four
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For those of you wandering….Yes. This was an actual conversation between a doctor and patient.

I still remember
coming home that night after giving myself away for the first time.

https://songsofintimacy.wordpress.com/2013/05/08/things-dont-always-work-out-the-way-you-want-them-to/

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Losing your virginity is giving yourself away. And that is what I did that night.
Only if I would’ve known I would regret that night for the rest of my life.
Sadly, chances are this girl will too one day. The nights she gave herself away.
Some might argue “she’s only experiencing” but what if we were meant to only give ourselves away to one person.

Chances are this young precious girl will continue to do what she’s been doing.
Unless she meets someone that cares. Someone that she feels really cares and loves her. Someone that she can trust.
Maybe that someone is you?
I was only 15 that night.
Looking back I had no one really that I could trust. Someone who could’ve shared with me the truth.
What truth?

That I was truly worth more!
That my heart would only take so much!
That giving away my body exchange for that feeling of love was not real!
That no matter how many boys told me or made me feel pretty, I would never deeply believe it untill I believed it!
And let’s be honest I didn’t.

I felt ugly.

I covered myself with a ridiculous amount of make-up.
Hoping and thinking That it would make me pretty. And at times it did the job. At least that’s what I believed. But the problem was it would only make me feel pretty/worthy for awhile but deep inside my heart I knew I wasn’t truly pretty.
I could have easily looked around me and quickly noticed all the really pretty girls and I knew I couldn’t compare.

So if I was that “someone” that had the opportunity to befriend that young precious girl.
I would share with her:
GOD most definitely has a plan and a destiny just for you.
And none of it weighs upon how much or how less you can compare with all those other girls.

Having sex with 2 boys or with 14 WILL NOT EVER cause you to deeply and wholeheartedly believe that you are beautiful!
Because your worth does NOT come from them!
Let’s say one day:
You alone painted a beautiful and magnificent picture.
But no one else seemed to think that it was indeed magnificent.
They looked at it as ordinary.
Did not pay much attention to it.
But one day here comes walking in the president of a top art museum.
Taking one glance at your art instantly WANTS it. And decides to buy it for millions.
At that point would it matter for a second what any of those other people “thought” about your drawing?

OF COURSE NOT!!

Well, your CREATOR created you beautiful and magnificent! Yes, some people may see you as just plain or ordinary. They may not see your worth and how beautiful and magnificent you truly are. But the King of kings, your Creator and Maker surly does!
He fashioned you perfectly.

Psalm 139:13-16 MSG:
Oh yes, You shaped me first inside, then out; You formed me in my mother’s womb.
I thank you, High God—You’re breathtaking!
*Body and soul, I am marvelously made!*
I worship in adoration—what a creation!
You know me inside and out, You know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I’d even lived one day.

None of those boys can make you believe that you are beautiful and worthy!
Yes, maybe they can make you feel pretty for a little bit.
Or maybe make you feel accepted and wanted for a minute.
But at the end your heart will remain the same. Believing what it believed
in the beginning.
Because your worth does not and cannot come from them or from sex. Or from drugs. Or from alcohol. Or from anything else.

It can only come from the One who formed you and knew you even before you were conceived!

So maybe one reason why I came home that night after losing my virginity still feeling the same. Still broken. Still lonely.
Was because my heart remained the same.
You see you can share your body with any amount of boys you choose. Letting them inside your body.
But you can never let them inside your heart.

There’s only one being you can allow inside your heart and that’s Jesus Christ.
And once you do. You can realize how much worth you had the whole time.
Your worth NEVER lessened. It always remained the same.
It’s just that the only One who could make you believe that was the Only One who made you in the first place.
Your artist. Your Sculptor. GOD.

His love for you never runs out.

It can’t.

Your His workmanship.

Your His responsibility.

Don’t ever forget that friend.

Now go and find a precious girl you can share this with. They’re waiting.
Their hearts hungry. Thirsty. To believe so much more.

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Photo credit: Michelle Brea / Foter / CC BY-NC-SA

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“A No Sex Challenge story”

I call it a No Sex Challenge Story……
Yes, these kinda testimonies (stories) really do still exist!!

You can find the story here or read below:

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……. my wedding is something that I’ve looked forward to for quite some time.
After having tied the knot at the end of August, I can now say beyond all shadow of a doubt, that it was everything I’d hoped and prayed that it would be since childhood. (I’d also prayed to be bitten by a radioactive spider and develop sticky hands, but… I was an idiot.)

Let me preface this column by saying this: my wife (I have to get used to saying that) and I not only waited sexually in every way (no, we didn’t pull the Bill Clinton and technically avoid “sex” sex,) but we didn’t shack up as live-ins and most importantly, we courted each other in a way that was consistent with our publicly professed values.We did it right. Our wedding was perfect. Our wedding night was nothing short of amazing.
I write this on a plane heading into a tropical paradise with the most beautiful woman to have walked the planet earth.

Feeling judged? I couldn’t care less. You know why? Because my wife and I were judged all throughout our relationship. People laughed, scoffed and poked fun at the young, celibate, naive Christian couple. We’d certainly never make it to the wedding without schtupping, and if we did, our “wedding night would be awkward and terrible,” they said. 

Turns out that people couldn’t have been more wrong.  
Looking back, I think that the women saying those things felt like the floozies they ultimately were, and the men, with their fickle manhood tied to their pathetic sexual conquests, felt threatened.

I think it’s important to write this column not to gloat (though I’ll be glad to), but to speak up for all of the young couples that have also done things the right way. When people do marriage right, they don’t complain so much, and so their voices are silenced by the rabble of promiscuous charlatans, peddling their pathetic world view as “progressive.”Our wedding was perfect. Our wedding night was nothing short of amazing. I write this on a plane heading into a tropical paradise with the most beautiful woman to have walked the planet earth. I know everybody says that their bride was the “most beautiful in the world.”  They’re wrong. I win.

I’d like to tell you a story of our morning after, however. One that transpired into one of the most glaring epiphanies I’d ever had.As my wife (again, still not used to that) and I ate breakfast at a local inn, we discussed how excited we were to start the rest of our lives together, how scary it was that everything was now so different. At the same time, we overheard the table next to us discussing their very own wedding from the night prior. What a coincidence!“The thing is, nothing’s really changed,” the bride said.Puzzled, my wife asked, “
Did you get married last night too? So did we!”“Congratulations!” the other dame said. “Yeah we did, just last night.”

“Where’s the groom?” my wife innocently… scratch that, naively asked.“Oh, he’s sleeping. There was no way he was coming out with me this morning!” She paused and smirked. “Let’s just say that he’s got a lingering headache from a really good time last night.”
My heart sank. Firstly, that poor schmuck’s “good time” was simply getting snookered. Not enjoying the company of close family and long-lost friends with a clear head and clean conscience, not staring in awe at his beautiful new wife, wanting to soak in every glimmer of her eyes as she shot him heart-racing looks from across the dance floor, not taking all of the cheesy pictures as they cut the cake, not even carrying her across that suite threshold as they nervously anticipated their “nightcap.” He probably won’t remember any of it. Instead, he got smashed.
He was “that guy”… at his own freaking wedding.

Then I realized something. Our wedding was truly a once in a lifetime event. It was a God’s-honest celebration of two completely separate lives now becoming one. Physically, emotionally, financially and spiritually, everything that made us who we were individually was becoming what bonded us together. Our family traveled from far and wide to celebrate the decision of two young people to truly commit themselves to each other, and selflessly give themselves to one another in a way that they never had before that very night.

The people next to us that morning? Well, theirs was just one big party.  And the morning after? Just another hangover.Our “weddings” were the same event in name only. They know it, and we know it.Do yours the right way.  If you’re young and wondering whether you should wait, whether you should just give in, become a live-in harlot/mimbo and do it the world’s way.  If you’re wondering whether all of the mocking, the ridicule, the incredible difficulty of saving yourself for your spouse is worth it, let me tell you without a doubt that it is.

Your wedding can be the most memorable day and night of your life… or just another party.

Oops. Did I just make a “judgment?”  You’re darn right I did.

Steven Crowder is a comedian and Fox News contributor. Follow him on Twitter@scrowder

A Pornography Society

That little “messy” ‘p’ word…..

Purposefully Scarred

The sexualisation of our society has had many incredibly detrimental and negative effects. The “pornification of women” has become so commonplace and so readily accessible, it is no small wonder 10 and 11 year old children are viewing porn on a regular basis. Pornography and those images which degrade women and the female body have become the sex-ed for the new generation.

Zoe Williams aptly likens the omnipresent sexist and pornified images of the female figure to air pollution:

I see pornographic images in mainstream spaces and I never give it much thought. Maybe it’s a copy of the Sunday Sport next to an offer on Maltesers, with a picture of a mostly naked woman in an auditioning-for-a-porn-film pose; or a T-shirt in the window of a high-street chain, with a picture of two naked women snogging; or a van going past with a picture of a pneumatic-breasted…

View original post 943 more words

..She said the *P* word.. AGAIN?!?! (Part II)

The story continues…
(You can READ Part I here.)

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PORNOGRAPHY RUINS lives!

Don’t believe me?

Just ask the lonely wife that crys herself to sleep many nights because she never feels “good enough, pretty enough, sexy enough, perfect enough”.
< She knows what he's looking at.
But she also knows she cannot and will not compare to those images. >

Just ask the ‘addicted’ husband who pounds the floor on his knees, once again yelling out for God to free him from this torment.
< He knows he needs to quit. He knows what it has done. But it seems the more he trys to give it up, the more he falls for it. To him, it’s become only a RED, FLAMING DEMON disguised in beautiful bodies. >

Ask the young beautiful girl that can’t seem to sleep at night because the REGRET, SHAME, and WORTHLESSNESS is too much to carry.
< She wants to get out, she wants to stop, but who could would love her after ALL she’s given herself over to – and allowed to be done to her…over and over and over? >

And if you could I’d tell you to ask ALL the countless men and women, young and old who have DIED in this so called “entertainment” industry.

But Sshh. Whisper. This is not something you talk about.

Even the word alone can leave a nasty taste in your mouth.
Porn.

At the end is it worth it?
Truly, Deeply, Honestly, Sincerely worth it?

And.. well.. If I could answer for all of these above
I’d say, ” NO! ”
HECK NO“!

Do not let your heart turn aside to her ways, Do not stray into her paths; For she has cast down many wounded, And all who were slain by her were *STRONG* men
Her house is the way to hell, Descending to the chambers of death!

Proverbs 7:25-27

The Truth can hurt. (Quotes that might leave you speechless?)

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“Throughout the animal kingdom, males have to prove themselves to females. But that’s not always the case for humans.”.

“When you shack up, you don’t owe each other anything. That’s why guys like it..”

“When a man loves a woman, he gets down on one knee. He doesn’t ask her to shack up & be his unpaid whore.

“Men ask women to shack up b/c they don’t want to make a commitment, put them on a pedestal, and elevate them to wifehood..”

“If a guy doesn’t respect your values, he doesn’t want you – he wants nooky.”

“Men wouldn’t get away with half of the stuff they do if women didn’t let them.”

“The number one cause of anxiety & depression in kids is divorce.”

▶▶ Sex can be hurtful not only because of infectious diseases but also because it leaves us vulnerable and more likely to cling to people who don’t love us, mourn those who leave us, and not know how to escape those who need us but whom we don’t love.

——————————-

My personal “quotes” to you:
You are beautiful.
You are worth more than gold.
You are worth loving.
You are worth respecting.

They just want to be loved

“The way girls give it up for nothing these days, it’s the best time in the universe to be a young male.” quoted radio talk-show host Dr. Laura recently!

But why do they give it up for almost nothing?
So.. Let me go back to when I was only 15 and I chose “to give it up”.

I wanted to be loved
I wanted to be delighted in
I wanted to be adored
I wanted to be enough..for somebody..anybody.
I wanted to be beautiful..and I wanted/needed to hear it!

My world was shaky
My father was an alcoholic
My parent’s marriage relationship was far from what any marriage should look like.
So maybe it was no wonder I didn’t know how a man should treat a woman.

I didnt know a REAL man protects.
I didn’t know a REAL man’s strength is not in his good looks, muscles, or popularity.
I didn’t know a REAL man actually romances you, talks to you, cherishes you, courts you, instead of just bypassing all of that for sex.

I “gave it up” because it felt good at the time.
I “gave it up” because I thought sex equaled love.
I “gave it up” because hey, he was cute, popular, and it made me feel beautiful. It made me feel enough. It made me feel wanted.
Not because he cherished me, or protected me, or loved me..Ha! Nope! I was only 15, I didn’t know what love looked like.

I know how it is to “give it up” just for that temporary feeling of being loved, wanted, and adored.
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