Perhaps because that god is easier to worship and please. Maybe because you can stay wounded, sick, and in your lies. Because that god doesn’t demand change. That god allows you to sulk, manipulate, and even abuse to get your way.
Perhaps because that god is easier to worship and please. Maybe because you can stay wounded, sick, and in your lies. Because that god doesn’t demand change. That god allows you to sulk, manipulate, and even abuse to get your way.
I hate you.
I hate what you stand for.
I hate what you do to them.
I hate what you did to him.
I cry at times.
You see, you transform something in the mind.
Its hard to explain.
(But if you have endured a battle with pornography OR know someone who has you know exactly what I mean).
It’s like their mind has been taken hostage.
I know the pain you cause.
But know that I am NOT blaming the individuals you use for your sick pleasures.
I believe they too are in bondage.
You suffocate souls.
All that is left of them are weak, pitiful, sorrowful corpses.
You see porn, I was a victim of your gross game. You helped rip out my heart out of my chest and slice it in a million pieces. I’ll never forget that day.
The day I found out my husband had succumbed to your hellish pit.
Your mockery and laughter I’m sure rang in the background as my heart shriveled, my mind became foggy and time seemed to slow down.
I hate you porn.
Yes, I know. I know. He willingly gave in. He CHOSE to buy into his passion and desires all those moments.
But I doubt IF he had truly understood what was happening. What he was giving himself over to. And the trials that would now lay ahead of him he would never had tasted of your corrosion.
But he did. But he chose to see you for what you really are. And he walked away from your dungeon.
Yes, there is an escape. Even though you tell them there isn’t. THERE IS!
God rescued him. And I loved him.
Yes, I did the unbelievable.
But I hate you porn. Because I know who you really are.
I can see through your fabrication. And now he sees it too. Actually so many do.
I hate you for the way you messed up his mind. But I’m praying.
I still hurt. My heart still bleeds sometimes. I still wonder at times if I’m “good enough”.
Your lies at times fill my mind. Your so good at that.
Slowly my heart is being repaired. The memories and pain can be extremely excruciating when they flood over me.
But I know The Healer that makes all things new.
But I won’t try to downplay how evil you are.
Remember one thing porn. I’m coming after you. Not physically. Because I know that is not how you are fought. Many try that but only continue to suffer.
I’m coming after you with prayer.
For you are an invisible enemy. That prowls after spiritually weak men. And once you have them in your grasp…
YOU CASTRATE THEM.
The whole while they truly believe they are real men while you visiously take their strength and watch as they succumb to nothingness.
But you have one less man in your cell. One more man that KNOWS who you really are.
I pray more men will realize there is a way out. There is hope.
But it is not fought in a physical battle. It is way much more then that.
The thief comes only to steal, kill and destroy. (John 10:10)
That is exactly what you are. A thief.
You steal, kill, and enjoy destroying families, MARRIAGES, souls.
SO yes, I hate you. But because of you I have learned the true meaning of forgiveness.
I have felt what it is to shower someone that does not deserve it with true love and mercy. And it is then that Jesus’ horrible death becomes more understandable. We did not deserve His love but He Still willingly gave Himself to die for us. He willingly loves us at our worst.
Because of you I know how it feels to have God carry me and lift me up while my feet scrape the ground.
And I promise that alone is one of the most amazing feelings in the world.
As the old saying goes “I have learned to kiss the wave that throws me against the Rock of Ages”.
So thank you.
Because of you I learned how strong my God really is.
And He said to me,
“My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.”
(II Corinthians 12:9)
I’m sad to say that the author of this letter ended up not making it with her husband. Sadly, he ended up choosing pornography over her and their children.
But that’s only part of the problem
The biggest issue is that it is going into our minds. Seeping in. Making it’s home in our very own hearts!
This is scary people.
Very VERY FRIGHTENING!!
It is what a lot of young boys are growing up on.
Kids hearts and minds are innocent, tender, trusting and need to be safeguarded from the negative influences of increasingly violent and sexualized media!
Pornography teaches sex without love, intimacy, tender touch, responsibility, and commitment.”!!
Pornography is more then a small sexual “secret”. Believe me I’ve read enough, I’ve seen enough and I have felt enough to KNOW it is an extremely wicked problem!
It may have started as a “fun” guilty pleasure but it has now (thanks to the internet) grown into a massive and festering addiction.
Pornography should be banned as SUPER-ADDICTIVE and DANGEROUS drug/behaviour much like Heroin, Crack, Crystal Meth!:
The research is there.
The findings are true.
Porn is as addictive as drugs!
Addicts crave it. Not because they necessarily like it.
Chances are they don’t even want to give in and watch it. But the cravings are there and they only continue to get BIGGER every time the addict gives in and bites!
It really is a very sad epidemic.
If you dont consider yourself a porn/sex addict then you might deny these facts.
You might only consider yourself “a moderate user”. But as any drug addict will testify. The cravings will grow undoubtedly.
And with porn there is NO EXCEPTION!
Just ask the man that can tell you that it all began when he just started with “normal” porn videos and/or images. But eventually his body needed more. His “fun” ended with an arrest of child pornography.
But you say that won’t happen to you. How can you be sure?
Are you willing to take that risk?
Is porn really that good that you would sacrifice everything for it?
Not only do you lose your purity and if you’re a man your manhood. But if that’s not enough your family, your wife, your children, and your respect is also all on the line!
So tell me is it truly worth it?
I’m sure the husband that has already lost it ALL would tell you it’s not!
I’m sure the wife that has felt the agony and excruciating heartbreak because of it would tell you it’s not!
And I’m sure the children that have been neglected and pushed to the side all because of their dad’s porn/sexual addiction/problem would cry out it’s not!
I pretty sure we all have heard the stories how an addiction started with a few beers. A couple cigarettes. A line of coke. No addict intended to become a full blown out addict.
No human being with a heart intends to neglect, abuse, push away, scar, or destroy the very ones they love and who love them.
Pornography leads to affairs. (Because it is an affair)!
Pornography can lead to rape. Pornography leads people into hellish fetishes that they would have never ever thought about in the first place without porn.
Pornography IS NOT NORMAL.
How can humans being degraded, abused and used be normal??
You watch that porn video and it starts off feeling good but believe me; not too far away there is a man or woman who is alone in his/her room pounding the floor, asking God to take away this vicious addiction! And he/she would tell you don’t do it! Don’t even begin with that one video! Don’t even think about it.
I as a parent would honestly advise my children to not even begin messing around with any drug.
So the same goes with porn.
It is a drug!
And I pray that one day it will be illegal and completely banned.
The repercussions are huge!
I am very positive that many reading could easily admit to falling into the trap of pornography.
I am very positive that many reading could admit that pronography did indeed lead them to do other things they truly did not even want to do.
Sex was NEVER meant to be dirty.
Sex is more then an act.
It’s something so deep.
Something so personal and private but not because it’s shameful. But because it’s meant to be between two people who sacrificially love each other with no doubt, no reserve.
And when you love somebody so sacrificially, & so immensely you do not want to share that personal and private bond with nobody!! No, not a picture, not a video, no peeking! That bond, that personal time… NO ONE should be able to sneak upon, to peek upon, or to watch it!
Sex is an intertwining of a husband and wife’s soul. They are one. And God, yes God looks upon that as good.
Your soul is costly woman.
You can not just give it away to any man. I mean you could but why? When your soul has so much more meaning and purpose! Your soul longs to be one with another soul. But you can in no way give yourself(your soul) away repeatedly to guy after guy with NO consequences.
You hurt yourself painfully more then you know when you do. It’s almost like you burn away at your own heart. Your heart over time becomes hardened and numb.
That is what I believe happens to all those precious girls in those porn videos. At the end they lose out.
Oh what many of them would give just to gain back their innocence.
And they have the porn/sex addict to thank for a lot of their pain.
For demand fuels the porn industry.
Kill the demand. Kill the porn industry.
Not that easy. I know. But it’s a start.
There may be a lot we can’t do.
But I know there is way more we CAN do! Even if it’s a small change.
So come on! Lets fight this demon!
I believe in you.
* * * * * * * * * * *
On Twitter: @songsofintimacy
And help share awareness with this hashtag #LetsFightThisDemon
Tell me. What would you do if you seen a man in public abusing a woman?
Slapping her around. Puncking her around. Pushing her around.
What would you do or how would you handle that situation especially as a man?
Not to long ago I watched this video about how people responded when they witnessed a couple (two “actors”) in the middle of domestic abuse.
It was good to see that people stood up and intervened!
But for me the best scene was when a man came from behind the boyfriend(actor) and kinda tackled him down to the ground to ‘rescue’ the girl.
It actually made me want to cry even because of the man’s bravery to step in and help!
And even after they informed the man that it was not real and just part of an experiment to raise awareness on domestic abuse. The man continues to ask the girl if she’s okay.
Then it made me think…
“Public” abuse of any kind is considered horrible, illegal, and shameful. BUT what about all the “private” abuse that goes on? You know.. abuse that is kept on the down low.
Like exploitation of women and children!
Or the sexualization of girls.
It’s pretty much everywhere.
Turn on the T.V. BOOM! There it is.
Walk around at the mall and it’ll slap you in the face.
Turn on the radio and yup it’s there too.
And if all else fails. Well, just give it up for porn. Because that sucker will chew you up and spit you out. Leaving you disrespecting girls and callous towards women in general.
No wonder women easily walk around believing they are only worth what they can do sexually!
And the sad part is men sit by and just watch!
They don’t come to their rescue. They don’t run in harms way to save us.
Instead of using their strength and power to push aside or “tackle” whatever is hurting us. They give it all away to their own selfish sexual desires.
Not even realizing
they are left spiritually castrated.
For sexual immorality indeed sucks out all of a man’s valor and strength.
O my son, Do not give your strength to women
For a whore is a deep pit, And a seductress is a narrow well.
She also lies in wait as for a victim, And increases the unfaithful among men.
I can’t speak for a man because I’m not one.
But I could only hope that men would STOP allowing women to be treated as objects that are only used.
And instead magnify their actions that would proclaim that women are human beings to be LOVED!
A man might ask: How?
And this is what I would recommend as a woman myself.
If and when they see a woman being objectified (which means treating a person as a thing, without regard to their dignity).
When they see a girl being sexualized.
Stop! Speak up! Say something!
Help her! Rescue her!
And many times that could simply mean
-TURNING OFF THE T.V.
-CHANGING THE MOVIE. -Or changing the music you hear.
-GIVING UP PORNOGRAPHY for good.
-Speaking to their daughters about the traits of a predator/liar/ narcissist.
-Speaking to their sons about respecting all girls.
Yes, even if they are dressed like prostitutes.
It would be awesome to see men try it.
Next time they came into contact with a girl/woman that unknowingly had the words “Use me” written all over her. Truly look at her. Into her eyes and tell yourself ‘she is an EQUAL to you‘.
Engrave it into your mind that she is worthy of respect and honor and love. Not that she might be dressed like it. BUT because she is a human being just like you.
At the end of the day. When all is said and done. We ALL want to be loved. No matter if we think we deserve it or not. No matter if everyone else told us or made us feel unwanted.
We all need love.
So let’s all try it.
Let’s do our part in NOT allowing ourselves or other women to be treated as things.
*Sadly, I believe lots of people take part in helping the exploitation of children and women without even knowing it.
A man can sit there and watch porn. He can sit there unmoved while a women is getting raped and violently abused in every way possible. He can sit there and witness the exploitation of a girl AND NOT BE MOVED TO RESCUE HER. TO SAVE HER?
What is wrong with that picture?!
I can only hope and pray that women everywhere would stand up, take control and shout NO MORE! to what is being done to them.
And for ALL the men that already are (yes they do still exist)
May your reward be great!
I once believed that sex was somehow connected to aggression.
In a world that glamorizes pornography, pimps, and lust. It’s fairly easy to get sucked into the lie that sex is not special, not truly intimate, and NOT RESPECTABLE.
That sex is just something “everyone” does solely
and ultimately for self-pleasure.
That is exactly what this world would want you to believe.
And I did. I fell into that ocean of deceit.
I can’t tell you when I did. But I believe it had to have been someplace during my childhood.
My vision and idea of sex became distorted.
If only someone would have told me or better yet if I would’ve believed that true pure sex DOES NOT fall into the same category as violence and aggression!
True intimacy DOES NOT feed off of humiliation of a woman.
***That is one reason why pornography can NEVER and WILL NEVER substitute or even come near to comparing to what God created sex to be.
God intended sex to be PURE PHYSICAL TENDERNESS.
Say it again. Out-loud this time. Slowly.
PURE – PHYSICAL – TENDERNESS
Those three words alone caused me to view sex different than what I had believed sex was.
I went years not really knowing or understanding what sex was all about. Even after I married.
And maybe I still don’t understand it fully but one thing I know without a doubt is that: the belief of sexual intimacy that this world holds IS NOT TRUE! That the view of sex that so many people carry IS NOT REAL!
And you can bet that it has a lot to do with living in a strong pornified generation.
Where based on a survey that was done 64 percent of American men and 20 percent of women view pornography at least monthly. AND… you might want to sit down for this…. 18 percent of men believe they may be addicted to pornography. That’s more than 20 million men in deep trouble.
Porn alters the brain.
Porn dehumanizes women.
Porn promotes rape. It fuels the rape culture.
After swallowing all that…it’s No wonder why we have too many men walking around really “believing” that sex is just a loveless, cheap, repetitive act.
It is obvious what kind of life develops out of trying to get your own way all the time: repetitive, loveless, cheap sex; a stinking accumulation of mental and emotional garbage.
Do you really believe that is what we were created for? No.
We are created for more then this garbage that trys to suck anyone in.
It is not racist.
It is waiting to feed off of you.
If you let it.
My heart and mind had become it’s victim at a way too early age.
I fell into it’s snare. Unknowingly.
And even though I probably wouldn’t have admitted it…..my actions told a different story.
I grew up in a home where a true marriage was never modeled. Almost every relationship around me was a bad example of what it should’ve been.
I didn’t know a thing about
You see I gave myself away at 15.
But what I didn’t know at the time was that I had already given myself away long before that.
I had slowly given my heart and mind over to “beliefs” that I thought I knew to be TRUE.
I thought attention and desire alone was love.
But in reality they were traps that led me deeper and deeper into one of the biggest lies I would end up believing.
That sex was everything but love. Everything but pure. Everything but bonding.
Pretty much anything but what God had created it to be.
And those “beliefs” led me and were leading me to some very dark roads.
A road that I now know (12 years later) if given the chance would’ve been pornography. Crazy to think that something I extremely ABHOR now is something I could’ve been a part of.
Every porn worker(star), every stripper, every sex worker willingly or unwilling had a childhood dream once. And I promise you it wasn’t to grow up and become a prostitute or a sex slave.
One thing we all have in common is: We all were at one time in a sense innocent. We believed in love. In Hope. And if someone would’ve told us at that time that sex indeed equaled pure physical tenderness and NOTHING LESS. We would’ve wholeheartedly believed it.
What if I told you that sex was supposed to be a soul-bond forever with
the person you chose to spend the the rest of your life with.
A bond only you would share with that person all your life long. A commitment. A holy gift.
Not something that was meant to be forced. Not something cheap or loveless. Not something just done to excite or entertain others. Not something dirty and impure.
To me it is so very sad that it can take years for someone to actually realize that. When it’s always been the truth.
When you understand Who created intimacy in the first place…you’ll begin to understand what it is. And what it’s NOT.
I believe that is the place where men and women in a sense can gain back that innocence.
It’s hard. But bad habits can be broken. Brain maps can be changed.
We are created for intimacy.
Just not the kind this world, the media, or porn tells you.
I am now no longer ‘bound’ to those “beliefs” I once thought to be true. Because now I know the truth. And the Truth has set me free!
“Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”
It hurts my heart to know that I was stuck in that pit of lies for so long. Even after I was saved and married. Coming to a point where I couldn’t even enjoy intimacy with my then husband because of the lies deeply embedded inside my mind. But God so graciously shined light and exposed it so He could purge it and wash it away.
I am a work in progress.
…From glory to glory friends.
There is always Hope. No matter how messed up our minds have become.
We live in a fallen world.
But the garbage this world would have you eat could NEVER exceed
the reason you were created.
For true, pure, wonderful intimacy first and foremost with your Creator. A love so clean and relishing. That you could never again allow a man to treat you the way you once believed they were supposed to.
True Freedom is peace my friend.
And I found that [of all sinful follies none
has been so ruinous in seducing one away
from God as idolatrous women] more bitter
than death is the woman whose heart is
snares and nets and whose hands are bands.
Whoever pleases God shall escape from her, but the sinner shall be taken by her. –http://bible.com/8/ECC7.26.AMP
…whose heart is SNARES and NETS and whose hands are BANDS.
She seems beautiful. ?
She seems perfect. ?
She seems breathtaking. ?
She seems like maybe the only thing that can satisfy you at the moment. ?
But she’ll take your integrity,
You might not even know it or feel it at first….. and by the time you do….it’s too late.
Her snares, nets, and bands are all wrapped around you.
Around your heart.
Around your mind.
Around your emotions.
You yell out for freedom.
Because you know now that it was all a lie. A mirage. Fake. Devilish.
How could something that might’ve looked so good at times actually be the very thing that DESTROYS your own soul…?
The very trap that has caused many strong men to fall into.
But he does not know that the dead are there, That her guests are in the depths of hell.
Porn. ..Pornography is a little word that creates HUGE damage. Not only for the person viewing and being “entertained” by it. BUT also for those in that industry.
I have witnessed the pain and hurt and destruction that it causes. And let me just say it takes a lot of forgiveness and God’s love to heal.
But I am not only talking about pornography.
●Adultery. You truly want to remain faithful. But “Ms. Loo-Loo busty” or “Mr. Hotty” just seem to keep eyeing you and well.. once won’t really hurt, right? .. . .
●Having sex before marriage when you know and believe that it is wrong. When you are trying to save yourself but temptation calls and you are feeling weak. …. . .
For she has cast down many wounded, And all who were slain by her were strong men. Her house is the way to hell, Descending to the chambers of death.
Maybe you say…
“Too late. I am already too deep in now to get out.”
Maybe her snares, nets and bands have already begun to spin themselves around you.
Yes, it may have a strong grip on you
BUT nothing is STRONGER than God’s power…if you want it.
If you are married Or are in a faithful relationship. ..please don’t give in to that seductive ‘chick’ or ..’hunk’.
It’s not worth it.
For the lips of an immoral woman are as sweet as honey, and her mouth is smoother than oil.
But in the end she is as bitter as poison, as dangerous as a double-edged sword.
Just a few more verses that warn us:
■….sleeping with another man’s wife will cost you your life.
■But the man who commits adultery is an utter fool, for he destroys himself.
■..she seduced him with her pretty speech and enticed him with her flattery.
Marriage can get hard at times.
But Staying loyal and faithful to your spouse is not only a vow you made on your wedding day but it is also a beautiful gift that your spouse or spouse-to-be will always be thankful for and cherish!
Plus staying true to one woman most definitely makes you a REAL man!
And the world sure does NEED more of them!!! 😀
So stay true, stay faithful, stay pure.
~And if your married…love & respect your spouse …and what the heck have some fun doing it. 😉
Need some help?…. Click here.
photo credits: http://www.flickr.com/photos/schmish/3474317057
That little “messy” ‘p’ word…..
The story continues…
(You can READ Part I here.)
PORNOGRAPHY RUINS lives!
Don’t believe me?
Just ask the lonely wife that crys herself to sleep many nights because she never feels “good enough, pretty enough, sexy enough, perfect enough”.
< She knows what he's looking at.
But she also knows she cannot and will not compare to those images. >
Just ask the ‘addicted’ husband who pounds the floor on his knees, once again yelling out for God to free him from this torment.
< He knows he needs to quit. He knows what it has done. But it seems the more he trys to give it up, the more he falls for it. To him, it’s become only a RED, FLAMING DEMON disguised in beautiful bodies. >
Ask the young beautiful girl that can’t seem to sleep at night because the REGRET, SHAME, and WORTHLESSNESS is too much to carry.
< She wants to get out, she wants to stop, but who
could would love her after ALL she’s given herself over to – and allowed to be done to her…over and over and over? >
And if you could I’d tell you to ask ALL the countless men and women, young and old who have DIED in this so called “entertainment” industry.
But Sshh. Whisper. This is not something you talk about.
Even the word alone can leave a nasty taste in your mouth.
At the end is it worth it?
Truly, Deeply, Honestly, Sincerely worth it?
And.. well.. If I could answer for all of these above…
I’d say, ” NO! ”
Do not let your heart turn aside to her ways, Do not stray into her paths; For she has cast down many wounded, And all who were slain by her were *STRONG* men
Her house is the way to hell, Descending to the chambers of death!
You can say it’s a well known word.
You can say it’s a dirty word.
You could even say it’s a “cuss” word.
Some could say “it” brought them pleasure.
Some could say “it” brought them intimacy..of some sort.
Some could even say “it” brought them entertainment.
BUT to the someone I know…
it ONLY brought shame.
It only brought
pain. No. Wait. Scratch that out. Excruciating pain.
Distrust. A lot of it.
Havoc. Soul and Body.
Was her world ending?
The world she knew.
All because of this *P* word?!!!
It would’ve, it could’ve, it might’ve..
But she chose to forgive.
And.. love again.
YES. I SAID IT.
To be continued….