My 31st birthday has come and gone. And as I sit here I know I am blessed just to still be alive. I don’t believe I would be here if I had never committed my heart to God. I believe … Continue reading
14 years ago I said bye to boys breaking my heart.
14 yrs ago I turned my back to all the lies I had fell for.
14 yrs ago I kicked the devil in the face when God demolished the devils plans and brutal, violent, merciless path he had for me all along.
Because 14 yrs ago I stood up firmly and became a daughter of the King.
I had to write a little something about the most amazing, miraculous experience that has happened to me.
If you are an active reader to my blog you already know what God saved me from. ( If not please check out some of my other posts)!
So I won’t get into too much of that.
But I will say that no one and I mean NO ONE could ever cause me to deny what happened that night 14 years ago.
Today I was entranced with the fact that it was exactly 14 years ago that I was rescued from a soon to be wicked and vulgar lifestyle.
I actually attended church service tonight. The same church where I was invited that same week I cried out to God.
I felt extremely humbled. Here I was 14 years prior a foolish young teenager with grossly immoral plans for her life when God decides to intervene.
What makes this day much more powerful now then let’s say years before is because now I truly know where I would be and how I would be living(if even still alive) if not for that transforming holy night!
You see I was like your ordinary teen girl. Loving boy’s attention. And trying to get it anyway I could.
And the heartbreaking thing was.. I was actually on my way to doing everything to get that attention.
Let me say that there are NO words that could’ve described my heart today.
To know where I should be compared to where I am now blows me completely away.
Wholeheartedly I believe I would most probably be dead by now.
Like my other posts reveal. The shame and regret eating at my heart would’ve led me to take my very own life.
So this post was just a thank you and reflection of the 14 years of soundness and wholeness I have truly experienced.
14 years ago I experienced my heart being put together.
Little by little.
But miraculously nonetheless!
14 years ago I finally let go of a lifestyle that would’ve without question led me to a real hell.
If I could say one thing to girls and women everywhere.
It would be that…..
His love is everlasting.
His love changed me.
His love transformed me.
His love converted this girl that was soon to become a stripper and later if given the chance an adult movie star. And believe me I don’t say any of that to boast because how could anyone in their right mind brag about something so disdainful as those lifestyles.
God’s love can transform anyone.
I’ve personally witnessed just to name a few…. drug addicts, alcoholics, and even “goody two shoes” touched by God’s love. If I know anything it’s that His love causes you to want more in life.
To want what your soul knows you were created for!
You were not made to waste away in some cheap version of love the world throws at you.
But I also know how it is to be in a place where that’s all you’ve ever known.
I thought love was giving yourself away. I mean if that was the only way I was going to FEEL love than of course I’ll be a stripper.
But what if a love so pure comes bursting in! A love so true that it literally leaves you wanting more. Except this time you don’t have to do anything cheap or vile for it.
It’s like that very Love shines through your very being and makes you whole.
I was so lost and didn’t even know it. But that’s how it usually is right? We can deny our sickness but if we have every symptom than the evidence is there. So even though I wouldn’t have admitted I was living for a cheap version of love. I definitely was. My symptoms were…I wanted to become a dancer. Also the way I dressed revealed not only my body but my hearts brokenness.
You see you can try to hide your heart but what’s inside will always come oozing out in one way or another.
God’s love proved to me that cheap thrills can NEVER satisfy your souls longing for true intimacy!
The whole human race has that desire for real love and intimacy inside them. That is why I believe so many run after the superficial tastes of it. They jump from bed to bed searching… They choose to become someone they hate. They willingly throw themselves at the alter of sin just to stop the deep cravings they feel.
So let me say it again. His love is everlasting.
His love chases and pursues you. As long as you are still breathing there is hope and a chance for you to accept His everlasting love.
So this once bruised up and busted girl never got to experience that world of hell that I would’ve if I had not allowed God’s love to cover my heart and rescue me from the world’s filth.
I don’t know who I’m writing this for. But just know that His love is out there following you. Pursuing you day by day. Waiting for you to realize that He is all you really want. Nothing more. Nothing less.