Brave and Free

I have a new blog at:

https://shebravelyfliesawayfree.wordpress.com/2018/10/14/abusive-cult

I won’t be posting much on this blog. So please click the link and follow me there on my new journey.

Thanks to all you that have read, liked, and especially commented on here throughout the years!

~Mandy

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Spiritual Abuse is real

* What I am sharing today is a little different from what I usually share here. But everything written here is from the heart. So for anyone that has sadly ever or ever will experience any abuse in “the church”. Know that through the pain and sorrow. God reveals who He is and who He isn’t. * Please follow @dianelangburg on twitter for more encouragement and wisdom on this topic.

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My view of a pastor. Of a man of God. Has always been a respected one. A Holy one. I would even go as far as to say an untouchable one.

Even if abuse came from the very same one that God intended to be a protector. Yes, that view remained the same. But the abuse hurt. The fear became confusing. The manipulation and control downright unrightous.

God began to reveal His tenderness towards me. And in that revealed what He wasn’t. That Jesus isn’t abusive. Isn’t confusing. And in anyway shape or form manipulative or controlling. His love has always been and will always be at freewill.

So what I’m trying to say is that abuse has no place in the church.

Spirtual abuse, clergy abuse, pastoral abuse, whatever anyone wants to call it. It’s still abuse. It dishonors God’s name. And the effects are heartbreaking. I came to realize it hurts God so much more than we can imagine. When ‘men in power’ trade in their God given power to dishonor who Jesus truly is than to lay their lives down for the sake of the sheep.

It is beyond understanding how the same power that was always meant to draw the sheep to Jesus is the exact same power used to harm and too many times even kill the sheep.

The sheep are crying out. So many of these sheep have no famous name. Have no known prestige or recognition. Which unfortunately causes their crys to go unheard or many times “swept under the rug”.

Sadly, so many sheep have gone astray believing the lie that ungodly power has taught them. That God is a disappointment. That God has betrayed them. That He has chosen to look the other way from their suffering.

But their are others that have come to realize the truth. The truth of who God truly is. And isn’t. And this God would never sacrifice his sheep to elevate Himself. Even to the point of dying on a cross.

The True Shephard would never under any circumstance coerce, manipulate, or verbally/mentually/emotionally or physically abuse His sheep.

God’s heart has always been to win over his beloved. And that very same heart desires for those allowing their power to harm and hurt those under their care to repent.

God’s name is honored when we use our power to reveal who He is. But also who He isn’t.

Jesus became righteously angry when they turned what should’ve been a house of prayer into a den of thieves.

What would Jesus say if He walked into your church?

Would He allow what you allow?

Would He ignore the crys of the afflicted?

Would He weep? Or would He become righteously angry at the treatment of His beloved sheep?

My cry. My hope. My prayer is that these words may be what allows a foothold into the door that remains closed with too many masked behind it. Perpetrators yes, but also those fearfully or unwilling to speak up.

Let’s talk about sex baby

Found someone who reminds me a little of what I write… so if your a Christian ‘chick’ especially if your dating or single….READ ON!! 🙂

WeLiftYourName

      Sex, the oh so awkward topic amongst Christians, but why does it have to be so awkward? God created sex as a gift to us, but it’s a gift that’s made for inside marriage. Sex creates a unique and very intimate bond that God designed to be kept between husband and wife. For some reason many Christians are afraid to talk about sex, they act as it’s an unholy matter, when it’s only unholy when it’s out of wedlock. God knows that when it’s misused it can cause many negative outcomes; abuse, heartbreak, a misconception on love, and so many other negative things.

     For some reason speaking about sex seems to be forbidden amongst Christians, but it’s a gift from God. It’s something that can be dangerous when it’s misused, that’s why God commands us to abstain from sex outside of wedlock. Our bodies are temples, not amusement parks, we are…

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The Mask

I believe this is the hearts cry of many girls that truly and deeply simply desire to be loved, wanted, accepted, and cherished.
And that kinda love does exist but the only place I truly and honestly found it was when it actually found me! All alone in my room one night crying like a baby out to a God that I had always pushed to the side not knowing that in Him I would find everything I had been longing for all my life… And I did and I have. 🙂

A dream come true

Happy Valentine’s Day! Enjoy another “No Sex
Challenge” love story! 😉
Also a story of a “DaddyLESS daughter” with a Happy ending!! …..

The Wacker Factor

As a girl, my one desire was to feel accepted and to be loved. From as far back as I can remember, I was lonely, timid, and very fearful.  I’m sure it had a lot to do with the fact that I was fatherless.  I’ve never met my  biological father to this day and for years it tore me up inside.

During my teenage years,  all my unanswered questions about my dad, amongst other things, turned into anger and resentment. That quiet little shy girl turned into a very rebellious teenager who no one had control over.

I began searching for love and acceptance through what I thought was”normal” teenage behavior. All the while, deep inside of me, was that quiet little shy girl crying out so desperately for a father and for someone who would truly love me.

Thankfully, at the age of 18, I found my father!

My

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The Leibster Award..

I was nominated for this award by the lovely Mizzpeh! Thank you! Thank you. Humbled that you even thought of me and this little blog.
🙂

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But I really don’t have 10 blogs to nominate that have less than 200 readers….eeekk…sorry….stone me later guys. 😦
But I thought I’d still answer the questions if I may?..

So here goes: ……
A little about the chica behind this blog…

Ten Questions from my nominee:
1.What inspires you to write?
*I would have to say my love for people/especially young girls or girls/women in general. God has just taught me so much since the time when I was a crazy teenager.. sooo…here I am sharing it with the world.
🙂

2. Summarise yourself in a sentence.
*My big heart gets me into trouble sometimes. 😉

3. What legacy do you want to leave behind?
*That I truly, passionately, and obediently loved God and loved people even when they “downed”me, spit on me, and treated me hatefully.

4. Your favourite place to write?
*Um..I guess my room..? Or pretty much anywhere God inspires me..

5. What do you want your blog to be remembered for?
*One: For being honest. Two: For changing, helping, inspiring or encouraging even one soul.

6. What is your best and worst quality?
*Oh wow….um…Best would perhaps be ..I love to encourage others. Which inturn encourages me! 😉
Worst: When I get frustrated or overwhelmed I tend to want to be mean or yell. 😦
(Just ask my hubby or kids) 😥

7. What is the most memorable day in your life and why?
* Would have to be January/2002! When this 16 yr. Old lonely, sad, and heartbroken teen girl found a love like no other…love she didn’t even know existed. …..The night I gave my heart to Jesus.

8. What are you most passionate about?
* God, my husband, my 2 beautiful miracles I call my kids. 😉 And witnessing torn lives, messed up marriages, depressed teenagers, (etc) RESTORED and healed!

9. What do you cherish the most?
*I cherish my relationship with my bestest friend slash/ second mom!!!
I know a lot of who I am today is because of the advice and wisdom she unselfishly poured out and continues to pour into me! Love her.

10. Your advice to other?
*Don’t sell out your self cheap!!! The world says SEX is just something anyone can do anytime. It tells you “Go at it, have fun, use it up and be used”.
WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!!
LIES, LIES, LIES!<—The more you listen and believe them…the more you fall for them.
Try Sex..GOD’S WAY
No Sex Challenge!
What do you have to lose?? Except maybe lots of tearful nights and broken hearts.
**********************************

(I will be posting blogs here that I nominate when I come across them.)

imsnowedin

Now, in order to formally accept this award please: Link back the person who nominated you (me!)
Answer the 10 questions which were given to you by the nominator (above)
Nominate 10 other bloggers for this award who have less than 200 followers
Create 10 questions for your nominees to answer
Let the nominees know that they have been nominated by going to their blog and notifying them!!

Protecting her virtue?

He thinks about it.
Actually he had been thinking about it a lot lately.
He looks at her, in her eyes.
She looks at him, straight in his eyes.
Her eyes alone look too sweet to resist.
How can he?
Maybe he can just try it again tomorrow.
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No! This is something he knows he needs to do. God only knows just how many good-hearted things he’s failed to accomplish in the past.
So here goes….
“I can’t tonight”, he says.
He kisses her slowly on her forehead. Walks past her and the bed before he changes his mind and quickly walks out into the living room and out the front door into the cool late night.

What on earth is he doing?
“I’m protecting her virtue”. He tells himself. Not just for tonight, but strength willing for a long long time.

He knows the consequences..
She might leave him.
She could betray him.
Shoot, she could even humiliate and laugh at him.
But she has to know, it’s for her, it’s because of her.
He can’t say it has much to do with love, because honestly he doesn’t even think he can say he ever truly loved her.
Some might call him prude.
Some might call him old-fashioned.
Some might even call him just plain stupid.

But what if…

Seduction

Salt & Sparkle

20130503-112757.jpg

I lust for the taste of your skin- I crave it. My hands are out of control I can’t manage, to think clearly or see what I am doing but to keep at what feels right. Until guilt eats me up at night and I burst out into tears not knowing what to say, but go back after the feeling that brought shame the following day.

What is it about you, that draws me to you. What is this euphoria that comes and goes as my flesh becomes a seductress and my soul becomes breathless. Constant suffocation is what happens inwardly as my outward self breaths the air my heart is not receiving. How can I be suffocated and ventilated all at once? How can I love this and hate myself so much? How can I see what is going on and not care enough to remove myself from a…

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